At the Edge of Nothing

I stand here,
At the edge of nothing,
Straining to hear words
Or distinguish form in the darkness of the Abyss.

I have heard of this place,
This empty space,
That leaves one to ponder
Meaning and meaninglessness

I came seeking an answer;
My heart so full
Of questions; the pressure of a river
Dammed within my chest,
Too small a chamber
For the swirling, pounding questions revolving therein.

I call.
Hoping, praying that Someone will hear.
He calms the raging storm,
But the thunderheads within my mind,
My breast,
Give me no peace.

"Increase my faith!"
I shout into the void.
I beg; the tears roll down my cheeks
Soaking my face, my bosom,
Mirroring the flood that surges within.

"You must know, certainly you know..."
My heart falters.
Why is there no answer?
I edge nearer,
Peeking over the edge to peer into the depths.

And suddenly I know;
Or rather, not suddenly, but steadily,
The realization grows
And blossoms
Giving off ephemeral perfumes.

And with the fragrance,
A voice.
"Will you?"
Fears assault my mind like so many thousands
Of troops and infantry.

Even so, I march
To the edge of nothing:
Left
I drop my cloak of security
Right
My tunic of common sense
Left
I loosen the straps of firm-footed reason
Right
The trousers of logic lie by the wayside
Left
Almost there
Behind me lie the tattered debris of arrogance, pride, knowledge
And independence
Right
The final garments, those of fear,
Discarded, cast off

I stand vulnerable
Exposed
Aware of my need; my flaws displayed
For Him to see
The barriers gone

I droop my head.
As a rose stripped of her protective thorns
Blown before the chill wind,
I shiver and slowly,
Slowly...
With one motion I open my eyes
And take the last step
Off the edge of nothing.

Written 10/11/09